


Once More

by deartheworld



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fallen Angels, M/M, post-season 8
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-23
Updated: 2013-07-30
Packaged: 2017-12-21 02:00:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/894479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deartheworld/pseuds/deartheworld
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel will come and go, Dean knows this. Castiel also will return to them, Dean knows this too. But a small part of him can't help but wish that Castiel will come and stay for once.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Once More

People will leave.

That is an unadulterated truth of life. The perpetual motion of people is something to expect yet unpredictable in the act itself. The manner in which people leave, the people they leave behind, the memories they carry with them, the emotions that drive them to act and the resulting reactions of those left behind; these can make the difference between a bittersweet farewell and a furious demand to never come back.

Dean Winchester is very familiar with the different types of goodbye. He gives many of them, more than anyone can count; as a hunter, this isn’t unusual. He receives them in return as well, all of them different from one another. Dean does his best to not forget any of the faces related to his cases. He keeps them painted on a canvas that he hides deep in his chest that he’ll sometimes gaze at when the going gets tough and he needs to get going. Because Crowley was right: the people that he has saved, they make his job more bearable. They make it easier to get out of bed in the morning.

Sometimes it’s not enough. Those are the bad days, the days where he can still hear Alastair’s laugh echoing through him. Those are the days where he can never was the red off his hands no matter how long and hard he tries. Those are the days where he’ll sit in the passenger seat and wonder what the world would be like if he had stayed dead or what his life would have been like if he never went to go bother Sam at Stanford. Sometimes he wonders if Sam regrets going with him to Jericho all those years ago. Some days he wonders if ruining other people is the only thing he can do.

These thoughts never last long though, always interrupted by a case of the sighting of their motel for the night. It can even be Castiel fluttering onto the backseat to sit in companionable silence. Dean doubts that’ll be the distraction this time. Cas can no longer drop in on them with a flap of his wings. Cas might not even have his wings anymore. He might not even be alive, is the main problem. Dean doesn’t know which is worse; Cas’s smile from 2014 still haunts him and he likes the idea of Cas finally getting a break from all the shit that’s been handed to him.

Good things do happen, just not for the Winchesters and whatever poor soul that gets mixed up with them. This is why it’s better if people leave; it keeps them safe. This is why staying is a novelty not yet offered to the Winchesters. They don’t have a safe haven to offer. Not even death is safe.

That doesn’t stop Dean from wanting Castiel to stay.


End file.
